it's been awhile.

does anyone still check up on me?

so sorry it's been so long. life has been so amazing and incredible i don't want to waste a moment 'typing' about it... but it's not right to deprive you all of the goodness! let's see... where to begin.

The last time I blogged was June, right? So four months later this is where I'm at... a married woman! hoorah. Marriage is such an incredible gift from God! I'm loving every moment of it. Caleb is uh-mazing in every way... it blows me away how much he loves me. (:

I should post photo's of our house soon. I don't think I've taken any pictures of it yet... perhaps I should clean it.

Let's seeeee.... the wedding! Seriously, I think I should win an award for the most stress free wedding. The day was beautiful and everything leading up to it just seemed to all work together. My parents helped out so much and praise the Lord that my family was all brought together by the Lord for this day. It was great, everything I wanted and more. cheesy, I know, but so true. God pulled all things together and blessed Caleb and I so so so much. His presence that day was overwhelming.

It's been a blast living together and being with each other so much more. He's so much fun! We went camping earlier this month and that was spontaneous and great. We bought our first washer and dryer unit... and we finally unpacked every box in our house! It's great fun.

now I must go and find something to eat.

Jehovah-Jireh

He is my Provider.

Life has been so incredible this past month. Everytime I start stressing out the slightest bit over something the Lord reminds me to give it back to Him and then shows me how He always comes through. It's been an overwhelming experience. One day Caleb and I were sitting inside of Starbucks and I was journaling about how I was worried about getting a photographer for the wedding. I've been having these reoccuring dreams where it's the wedding day and everything is perfect except.... no photographer! seriously, for those of you who know me you can see how this is obviously my worst nightmare. So here I was praying that the Lord would just provide someone, anyone really, who was handy with a camera and I could rest at ease knowing my wedding would be "picture perfect." Well, you know how He is. Literally the next day a photographer contacted me and agreed to photograph the wedding. God is so good, right? but wait... it wasn't just any photographer but the one that I've aaalways wanted. isn't that rad? yeah, He's pretty rad.

There have been so many other things too... super cheap rent for the cottage we're living in. well, only Caleb right now... I move-in in August. (; aaand for the honeymoon. "where do you honeymoon when you live in Hawaii?" necessities for our home and free furniture.

...like I said, an overwhelming experience.

"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

Philippians 4:19

and that's just a small amount of the blessing He has poured out in my life... I couldn't even try to say all that He is doing because it is immeasurable. Through it all I am reminding myself, it's not about the blessing it's all about the Blesser. and it's very evident to me that He has done all of this to bring glory to His name.

uhhh... yeah.

hello my dear bloggers, it's been quite sometime...

let's see, life "after" Bible College feels a lot like in between semesters... everyone leaves, you're still here, you go to work, you don't have homework, you watch movies, you don't listen to chuck tracks (even though you swore you were going to do them over the break)... did i really graduate? that last week seemed so surreal. everything leading up to that last night of graduation... actually, i still had one last class the next day so even though I graduated on Thursday night I wasn't officially done until Friday afternoon. It was crazy... There were seven students graduating and pretty much all of us waited til last second to prepare our 2 minute speeches we were to give on our, "belief, hope, and direction." "what does that mean?" is pretty much what we kept asking each other all day. it was a fun night and ended with an awesome slideshow! you might be able to view it here: http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/video/video.php?v=1160804385294&ref=mf

anyways, all that to say my Bible College experience added up to a great one. I'm so blessed to have been able to finish all four semesters and to have shared with the most incredible people every semester. God is so good.

So what's next? well, obviously marriage. (woohoo!) right now is a really big season of transition and it's all happening in a super short amount of time... but, I'm not stressing. which is kind of a big deal for me. I'm just taking it easy and going along for this crazy ride that God's totally in control of. So, if you think of it, please pray for Caleb and me we would appreciate it more than you could ever know! Wedding plans are coming along quite nicely... except for the fact that i've never planned a wedding so i feel like i'm forgetting some important things. I don't even have a photographer yet... oh dear. i guess as long as i'm there, Caleb's there, my dad is there (he's performing the ceremony), and the marriage license... oh, and you too mom... then we're good! and maybe throw some cake in there too. THEN we'll be good. yeah, so you kind of see where i'm at right now... it'll all come together. (:

Already we're seeing the amazing things that God is doing for us. Preparing and blessing us, He's definitely blowing our minds. It's been super cool.

it all comes down to this.

haha, okay. so i've been waiting 3 years for this moment! i'm graduating tonight and i'm sooo excited! 

it's going to be great... and i'm writing my speech right now.

whew. 

the end before the beginning.

well, the end of the semester is finally here. i guess i always talk about how fast these things go by so i'll try to spare you all in this post. it's just so crazy how fast it goes (that's all i'm going to say)!  It's coming at a good time though. summer will be sweet and at the end is a wedding! woohoo. i'm really looking forward to getting down all the details for "the big day". for those of you who are wanting updates on how it's all going... I have my dress, the colors, a venue, and a budget. haha. kind of still feels like the beginning but i know once i'm officially done with school i can really gear up and start checking more and more things off the list. 

Caleb and I took our engagement photo's last Friday, one of our friends shot them for us. they all turned out great, I was so excited. (:  I'm not sure how into he was, but i kindly reminded him that it's pretty much going to be like on the wedding day. camera flashes in every direction we look. which is good because i love photo's! and so does he... i think it's the whole model thing he's not all that into. haha.

anyways, tomorrow is graduation! i'm super excited. there are 7 graduates this semester which is the most we've had in a long while. the past 3 or so years it's one or two. so everyone's excited about this one. a good amount of them are staying on the island over the summer. which is cool and most are coming back next semester. It's going to be an interesting transition being married but still around Bible College lifestyle and that ministry but not being a student. But I'd so much rather be a wife (whoa!). hahaha. Caleb is going to be teaching The Life, our College Group on Monday nights. I'm really excited about it. he's a really good teacher and I know it will be a good opportunity for him to sharpen that skill a little more. but it's only going to be for a part of the summer, then we have the new Dean of Students moving in. This summer will be full of change for a lot of people, the Lord is really moving hearts and lives here. especially in the literal sense. so many people who have been here for the past few years are moving on, "from glory to greater glory." I'm so excited to experience the things God has for me personally. it's such a grand adventure! i'm so glad we serve a big God who never disappoints or lets us down.

a tribute to.

First and foremost, my BFFEEE (that stands for Best Friend Forever and Ever and Ever and Ever.) haha. My Fiancé, Caleb McLellan. "capital M-c capital L-e-l-l-a-n, get used to spelling that." yeah, i love him more than anything or anyone. oh my, so much to say and yet i feel like i just want to keep it all to myself. He's uh-maaazing... and he loves me! wow. I never knew I would be the one who was blessed with the privilege of have the most amazing friend in the whole entire world and get to spend the rest of my life with him. okay, yeah, this is going to be cheesy. but what do you expect? I'm in love. 

alright, alright, so he's a total goofball and we don't always understand each other. but what we lack in that we make up for in commitment, and it's a work in progress. i know we can only grow more and more and it's exciting! we're getting married the 7th of August and i'm already counting down the days. God has blessed us beyond measure and He continues to blow our minds with the grace He has pored out on our lives. he's a huge help and encourager, always there to pick me up and make sure I'm doing the best I can. and myyy goodness, he's soooo handsome.





Cara-Poo. where do i even begin? this girl is hysterical! what is the percentage of time spent together that we just sit there and laugh... for whatever reason. it's most likely something totally different from the time we began to the 5 minutes later when we finally catch our breath. speaking of which, she is a breath of fresh air. whatever we do it's just relaxing and a time to be ourselves and unwind. for the longest time we didn't even realize how good of friends we could be and i wish we could have that time back cause now we're apart and closer in heart but i wish we were together. she's going to be a bridesmaid! woohoo! i wouldn't of had it any other way. we just get each other... even when it makes no sense, you know? yeah, i know. 

She's been such an encouragement to me over the years and a huge blessing. life would be so boring without her laugh to make me laugh. 

"boys are whatever- God is forever!"

(sorry Caleb, i don't mean that first part now...)

uh-LISH-uh! oh, how i miss thee! let me count the ways... sitting with you every morning in 'dewotions', eating dön-shanks and drinking coca-cola that we had saved for those nights, having urgent heart-to-hearts right when i needed them, memorizing 26 verses in like 3 days but most the night before. oh my, talk about a best friend. from the moment we met each other we were addicted... always side by side. like peanut butter and jelly, pompom and homestaw, espresso and steamed milk (or in your case, just chocolate and steamed milk), left and right hand mittens? like Paul's greetings! grace and peace... it was obviously meant to be. i just miss being around you so so so much. you truly were my best friend those four, long, cold months in Germany. I don't know what i would've done without you, seriously! God is so good in the way He brought us together, if it weren't for the love of traveling you have and the island fever i had it would of been a lot harder for us to meet. but He knew. and you would of had barely any photo's of your first semester. (;

Jesse VK. oh, what a lovely lady. one of my closest friends through all four semesters. someone very close and dear to my heart. She has the most beautiful heart that encourages everyone around her. She truly lives out the Word and has an incredible heart that desires the Lord. She loves everyone around her, which astounds me! One of those kindred spirit kind of gals... we just get along with each other and it's a blast! whether we're having a heart to heart, a lazy day, or being mischievous... which we tend to be more often than not. God truly knew what He was doing when He brought her into my life. I admire her so and her thrill of adventures... haha. she is a treasure! a bwight and shoining staw afaw off in the darkest skies. 

oh, and she has the biggest smile... ever!

last, but not least, my sisters (Val Pal and Smereena). oh my, how i love them. they're my best friends because... they are my sisters and nothing comes between blood. haha. also, they love me so much... i know this because they've forgiven me time and time again. amazing, huh? we're each super different, but just enough a like to drive each other crazy. there's so much love and comfort in their presence with just enough teasing and sassy sarcasm. But above all they love the Lord. I know they will be here for me and i for them... although not always in the physical state. we're there for each other. Like Moses in Exodus 17, we can be the Aaron and Hur for one another in a sense. and it's a gift from God, everyone of my sisters.

The Holy One.

So we raise up holy hands to praise the Holy One who was, and is, and is to come.

so yeah.

it's weird thinking that this is my last semester in Bible College...

what the heck are you going to do after this? haha, that's what i want to know!

it's good to know that He already knows what i'm going to do. He knows where i'll be and 

what i'm going to become. what a comforting thought. 

it's amazing how fast these past two years have gone by. i know i always blog about how fast time slips away, but seriously! it really has been going by faster these past couple years. maybe it just seems that way cause i've changed the most in those years. God is so good, He knows exactly where we need to be. the people we need to meet. the words we need to hear. all in order to grow in grace and further His kingdom. it blows my mind when He shows me just how much He loves me by how personal He is with me. wow. wow. wow! it's cwazy. 

well, i'm getting that bug again... you know, the one that itches and scratches when you think of a place away from the here and now.

somewhere distant and magical.

a new experience, a new adventure, a new culture.

oh my, that sounds grand! 

it'll be cool after Caleb and i get married cause we really want to travel. soooo, i really hope and pray that it happens. God knows our desire and, when we're seeking after Him, His desires become our desires... how cool is that? i'm seeing things play out already and it's so rad! just amazing things that i didn't think were possible... radical things are happening. why does He do things i don't deserve? cause He loves me so much! my heart feels like it's going to burst with praise and rejoicing when i think of His faithfulness. 

You are good, You are good, and Your love endures.

remembering...

most of the time now, when i think about updating my blog, i imagine myself in the cafe' at CCBC Siegen. it's very nostalgic.

anyways, i starting missing how i don't update my blog as much anymore... i was so good at it. which is somewhat shocking to me. but whatever. i guess i think that since i'm not in a foreign country anymore my life must not be exciting anymore. i guess you can be the judge of that.

this past week was spring break! it went by waaay too fast... i was supposed to catch up on homework, lots of homework, but that didn't work out too well. now i'm back at school trying to manage my time well enough to stay on top of it all and i find out that i have a paper due today!... go figure. no worries though. not a big deal. i'll just blog instead. hmmm.... some things never change. 

so yesterday was Easter Sunday, the church was full of fun and excitement! we played with a fuller full band. ha. it was uh-mazing. sam on drums, david on bass, val and coleen singing, papa leading it on his taylor, caleb on the strat, and me on the tele. two electric guitars! it sounded so good, i never knew adding that third guitar would give so much. sounded like we were in a studio. haha. it was a really sweet time of worship. one of the coolest things about being up there is when you're worshiping and you can hear the congregation in chorus singing straight back. so sweet. God is so good, and so worthy of our praise. 

tonight we have "The Life", our college group here at CC South Maui. it's also a fun time. Caleb leads worship with me and another student, it's been super rad being able to play with him every week. something i missed so much when i was in Germany. but anyways, it's about time I get going. i have a ton of new photo's but i have yet to upload them. did i say what my M1 was for this semester?... "official school photographer" now i'm being graded for my work! haha, kidding. it's been fun. and i have an excuse to be annoyingly clicking away. 

something new.

I'm engaged!... to be married!

wow. how exciting, huh? it's a crazy concept... like i knew i'd always get married and i knew i was going to marry Caleb. But it's really strange actually beginning to plan a wedding. plus there's so much to it! myyy goodness. colors, dresses, cake, food in general, venues, guest lists (ah!), chairs and tables? haha, it'll be fun to plan a huge party... but, as so many people say, "it's not about the wedding! it's about the marriage!" oh, too true. so then there's the question i have to ask myself, "am i even ready to get married?!" all i know is that it's a mystery... i'm not even sure how it all ended up like this. God is so so so good. the ways He works... the ways He provides... the ways He gives. it's all too good for me and way too much for me to ever fully grasp. So, I trust Him and that He'll teach the both of us along the way. But pray that I learn a lot in this period of "engagement". cause, "it's really nice, but i don't want to be [engaged] forever."

"All I want to do is grow old with you..."

let's have a heart to heart.

God has been stretching me so far lately... it seems. sometimes i have to stop and remind myself, "this is what you wanted, you asked Him to do this." it's just really hard at times when you forget why. "but is it supposed to be this hard?" the reason is to grow closer to Him... "oh yeah, that's right."

another thing is that i'm realizing of how fickle i am... and i don't like it. i've been hearing so many teachings and little things about keeping your word and what not and then i look back on the past month and see how many times i've failed at that. i stink at it. and it's not alright. just in the simplest things too, like calling someone back, or hanging out with a friend. cleaning up, preparing something. or even singing someone a song. and wearing scarves and a fake mustache... and i don't think i'd go so far as to say i'm feeling convicted about it. which is a good thing, yeah? cause that's no who God calls me to be. I'm not supposed to be a fickle pickle, my word should be something someone can depend on.

Anyways, everything has been going well for me. I can't believe we're already in the month of March... time flies quickly these days. there's so many people visiting the island these days... i think like 7 different people/families just in these 6 weeks. not all at my house, of course. whew. that would be a bit insane. 

baha. we didn't carve that, it was already there on a tree in Hana.

it just hit me.

i've been in Bible College for almost 2 complete years... but... i still have so much more to learn. it seems like this semester things are all the sudden starting to click in my brain. "wow, that makes so much sense now!" haha. its weird... going into it i figured by the time i graduated i'd be set, have it all figured out, know where i was going, how i'm going to live my life. and to a certain extent i do know. i know that i'm going to live the rest of my life to glorify God in everything i do. that's the obvious vision i have... i'm going to go where He leads, follow the plan that He has placed on my life. but still, i've realized that there's so much more to learn! "umm, God, could i spend about 5 more years in Bible College and then you can send me out?"  i don't  want to be a coward. i'm going to take His hand and let Him lead, let Him teach, and let myself see the amazing ways that He works through me. I've done my best so I'll let God do the rest! (: i think Papa Chuck said that in a track not too long ago.

i'm getting so much out of this semester and it's a tremendous blessing. God is so good. I keep on having these reoccurring dreams that I'm back in Germany for the semester and then i wake up feeling like i'm in the wrong place... but this is where He has me for now and there's no where else i'd rather be than in His will. 

Praise Him!

middle of February.

well, needless to say it's been awhile. i've forgotten how slow time seems to go by in Maui... or maybe it's just this season.

Val took a vacation back to the mainland so i had a job working as the church secretary for 2 weeks while she was gone. so i started working the same day i had my first day of classes... it was kind of crazy the last two weeks. i haven't had to work and go to school for a whole semester. and it was a fast transition from doing nothing into doing something all the time... if i wasn't working, i was in class. if i wasn't in class, i was doing homework. if i wasn't doing homework, i was sleeping. haha. but i did have time to hang out, spend that much needed time with the Lord, and watch the office with Caleb... I've been enjoying all my classes very much. this is my last semester here at CCBC and i'm super stoked. it seems as if i've been in Bible College forever. but i'm really enjoying everything so far, it's been good. these are the classes i'm taking:

Christian Ethics with Ann Sugrue

Mark with Lloyd Folsom

Women's Discipleship with Lora Casco

Lectures in Theology and Ministry with Pastor Dominic/David Courson

Christian Leadership with Dr. Arthur Dhanaraj

Psalms with Steve Woodard

anyone looking for an update?...

whew! we made it through january!... well, almost. (; school starts up next week already... orientation on friday. this is cwazy! haha, but i'm so stoked and so ready to start this next semester. i'll admit, i actually missed school over break. do you find that odd? i think it's kind of sad considering this is my last semester. i'm super excited to graduate. i'm also getting excited to meet all these "new" students. there's a lot returning from last semester so i don't know any of them but they all know each other. so once again i get to be one of the new kids. i would ask that you would please pray for this next semester, for unity and things like that in the student body. also academically and spiritually... we need focus and our hearts to be tuned into God's voice and His leading in each of our lives. that's why we're here, isn't it? so yeah, i'm just really stoked. i have a good feeling about this semester, i know it'll be a great one!

i know i haven't updated in forever! i apologize. sometimes i just don't know what to say cause nothing is really going on. ha. i've just been hanging out, not really doing much. i'm almost a week ahead on chuck tracks... i'm trying to write some new songs... trying to catch up on taking photo's... i tend to forget how much of a night owl i really am. kind of frustrating when you feel motivated to do all this stuff but you can't cause it's the middle of the night. 

let's see... what else. today is mine and Caleb's 10 month anniversary. so we had a nice day just chilling with each other and really had a good chance to just refocus and all that relationship type stuff. he's such a blessing to me, i appreciate him so much. 

this past weekend we both went up to Hosmer's grove with the high schoolers in the church to camp for the night. there was about 14 of us. it was pretty fun, pretty chill, and pretty cold! it's at an elevation of like 8,000 ft. (2,438.4 meters) pretty high up there... but it was nice to do something different. i wanted to post a photo from our nature walk, but blogger is being really slow or something? i don't know. it's just not uploading my photo and i've been trying for the past hour.... oh well. next time there will be photo's if blogger decides to cooperate!

mmmkay.

time for another update, i suppose. :)

life back in Maui is slow... i like the island life but still it's so hard to escape from that island fever. but, it's beautiful here, the weather is great, the wind is blowing softly, the palm trees are swaying... hmm. oh, it's also whale season! all the whales swim down from the cold waters up in alaska to the warm shallow waters  that lie between the islands; they come to make babies and give birth. sometimes we go on boats to go "whale watching". that's always fun, but it's only once in awhile every other season... they come between November to May. it's super cool cause your just at the beach, chilling, tanning, no big deal.... and then... all of the sudden... a ginormous 40 foot whale jumps out of the ocean! cwazy cwazy. i was thinking to grab my telephoto lens next time i go to the beach and try to snap a few shots. (: that'd be rad! the photo is from last year (2008)  around february? end of january? something like that. it's a momma whale and a baby whale. 

anyways, there's not much to update on. i'm considering starting chuck tracks soon... maybe... considering... we'll see how ahead i get before the semester starts.... wishful thinking. (; other than that i've recently become slightly addicted to the game bejeweled on my itouch. it's a fun game. haha. oh, and tomorrow marks the official "job hunting" day. wish me luck! i don't want to go back to work at Ruby's... so don't ask. (: 

my best friend.

i love you, Caleb Benjamin!